Staying home is the safest thing to do but it doesn’t have to be a bummer

In my twenties I lived in Chicago and flew home to Connecticut only once for Thanksgiving (so that I could attend my 5-year high school reunion which was ill-advised). Being a plane ride away meant I couldn’t afford to come home for both Thanksgiving and Christmas. …

Updated superstitions and justified paranoia for the new year

1. Going outside with wet hair will make you catch a cold that you won’t be able to treat until your insurance premium goes down.

2. If you swallow gum it will stay in your stomach for the length of time it takes you to find an in-network gastroenterologist: 7…

Because every. single. story. deserves to be told

1. Weather/Wither

Global warming is the single greatest threat facing our planet. But in Medium’s new publication, “Weather/Wither,” we’re exclusively focusing on the inane weather conversations that define the American work experience and make you want to die inside. We’re not interested in reported features on Norway’s melting ice caps or the…

Ali Kelley

Brooklyn-based writer raised in the Connecticut suburbs. Words at Slate, Washington Post, McSweeney’s Internet Tendency / https://alikelley.com/

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